Friday, March 11, 2011

WikiLeeks Exposes Rat Syndicate Plot

In recently released documents from the WikiLeeks (the recently created Lynn based online organization whose mission is to ferret out the truth about what goes on in the city) a plot by the local Rat Syndicate has been exposed. Below are transcriptions of actual internal communications from the Rat Syndicate. Whiskers is believed to be the head of the syndicate and Snubtale is one of Whiskers top lieutenants.

Transcribed text:

To: Snubtale
From: Whiskers
Date: November 17th
Subject: Puleo Operation

Snubtale, I would like to congratulate you on your unit operation targeting Margaret Puleo. Judging from the news coverage at the Item it is having its desired effect. We need to keep these humans pointed in the wrong direction.

Good work,


To: Whiskers
From: Snubtale
Date: November 18th
Subject: Re: Puleo Operation

Thank you,

It was laughably easy. All had to do is send a couple of my boys scurrying along her fence between her yard and the garden during times that I new she would notice. It was brilliant of you to target her. She blew her lid and easily convinced those doorknobs on the city council to put up a fuss.

Talk to you soon,


To: Snubtale
From: Whiskers
Date: November 20th
Subject: Re: Puleo Operation

Sorry it has taken me a couple of days to get back to you. I have been at some important meetings with other gangs in the city. The Crips and the Bloods have been impressed with our work. They love that that Puleo and those dunderheads Cyr and Trahant blame the garden for human gangs in the area. They want us to push harder and see if the we can get the garden shut down. The Food Project has been hampering their recruitment.

But you and I know we need to keep this at a low boil. The longer we can keep the city government distracted by this garden the longer they will not pay attention to those areas that are important to us. The way this city handles garbage collection and vacant houses is perfect for us.

Anyways, tell you boys I have a 5 day old Little Ceazars pizza and half eaten Dunken's donut waiting for them at headquarters as a reward for work well done.



End of Transcriptions

Our colleagues over at WikiLeeks tell us they have many more communications like this one that they plan on releasing in the coming weeks. We at the Tomato will stay on top of this reporting for our readers.


  1. Hooah! Hooah!
    The acorn boy infantry, 11 Bang-bang, barricaded Collucci in Diamond Town, with delivering Little Ceazars. He hasn't been able to leave his home to help out Ward Hilltop. We may need more backup, before the October surprise begins.


  2. There's been an interception of Queen O'Flannigan's diary. Page 1 is scribed-

    Date 1/1/10

    Dear diary,
    Today, a new day in my queendom, I woke out of bed and decided to be an urban planner. Heck, if the Duke of Marshmallow Land can do it, I'm smarter, so can I.
    (signed) The beloved Queen


    There might be a connect between fluff & the duke.