Saturday, February 19, 2011

Lynn City Clerk Jerry Mander Announces New Ward Map

Today Jerry Mander, the newly appoint Assistant City Clerk for Maps and Wards, announced the new redrawn ward maps.

"Because of the 2010 Census we needed to make it look like we did some adjustment to our wards. Plus I need to justify the $120,000 salary and $50,000 a year confidential secretary. So Ward 5 will get a piece of Ward 4 and Wards 4 and 2 will trade some streets." Mr Mander announced.

Asked why the downtown core where the most people of color and low income folks live will continue to be split up amongst all the wards Mr. Mander replied "It would be dangerous to let that rabble get their own voting block and have true representation on the City Council. It is much better to have their current representatives wisely make decisions for the poor souls. Also, it would be sad for Billy Trahant to lose his seat and not have the money to buy those awesome state flag themed sweaters he likes to wear to council meetings."


  1. Tomato, I'm surprised Mr. Mander returned your call!